Reporting on campus bullying, it is sometimes difficult to reason for Chinese people.After all, the Singapore Ministry of Education's survey in 2022 shows that the bullying cases of Singapore schools maintain a stable and rare state. In primary and secondary schools, only two to five cases of each 1,000 students.However, the campus bullying incident we encountered in reality has continued to increase, and the data has emerged.Xu Tianyu's to say "No" (June 5th Morning Post · Exchange Station on June 5) pointed out that bullying behaviors are becoming more serious in locally, irreversible blows on minor students, and describing the victims with the experience of friends around them describing the victims.Students' psychological suffering.
Earlier, the Ministry of Education of China demanded that the school's concealed places were installed to monitor the defense campus bullying (June 1, Lianhe Zaobao), and also pushed the bullying behavior to the cusp.The Ministry of Education of China requires schools to cover full coverage in the hidden places such as corridors, rooftops, and storage rooms.This deterrent prevention campus bullying behavior, in addition to triggering a lot of controversy, also reflects the severity of campus bullying behaviors worldwide.If the Singapore campus really wants to say that there is almost no bullying incident, schools, teachers and parents may not be aware of it.Do not dare to say, do not dare to ask, disregard, and do not deal with it carefully. They are all "invisible incentives" that have become more serious and have not been cured.
Bullying behavior is so difficult to solve, which may have been blame the bully and the bully, but they have little close relationship with them.The bullies are often labeled as "weak and incompetent", but the so -called cowardly behavior is sometimes soft because the bully person does not want to be punished by the bully, not the defect of personality.Luo Yijun, a parent -child communication writer in Taiwan, once said that children who have been bullied often have the characteristics of bullies desire, such as: love, strength and kindness.We should not only see the shortcomings of the bullying children, but we should encourage and stimulate their selfless love and the kindness of kindness.When teachers and parents were "three -year -old and eighty" thoughts, we regarded their children as vulnerable victims, and we also lost a chance to teach them to warm people's hearts and influence others.The child is not fragile, and the fragile is those who are afraid of them.If the school and the family fall into fear and dare not ask the bullies, the child will always be isolated.They can only explore, and even rely on Maladaptive Coping Strategies, such as: self -harm, abuse of drugs and suicide fantasies to cope with the suffering of bullying.
Secondly, the bully is not simply "sexual evil".They and the bullies are more likely to get mental illness than the average person in an adult, which may be related to the family situation and the parents' discipline of their children.The University of Malaya's spiritual and psychologists wrinkled, and believed that the family's expectations for their performance were too high or the family's economic situation was not good, which could cause intangible pressure on their children and caused some children to vent through bullying behaviors.In addition, using words or behaviors to discipline children can easily cause imitation behavior.Perhaps the bully is also a victim in a sense.However, if the school knows that a student is bullied others, will they sincerely help the bully or choose to ignore it?I think there may be a higher chance of ignoring.Because there are very few staff members who can deal with these psychological problems, many schools still solve bullying behaviors in simple and rude ways such as apology, whipping, and firing.These methods seem to have the effect of severe punishment, but they do not handle it carefully.The bully and the bullies have not been redeemed in their minds, and the school has not positively resolved the reasons behind the campus bullying: lack of good education.
The so -called kind education is mainly replaced by goodness and empathy.The school's physical punishment is exactly the same as the violence discipline of parents, but only aggravate their psychological trauma.Kindness is so precious because it has a two -way rush.The bullies themselves will want to be treated kindly, and bullies usually have the characteristics of goodness and empathy to cure others.Good education must include: help students to set the bottom line of themselves and respect others, teach the bully to not exceed the boundaries of goodness, and learn how to reflect on bullying behaviors from the perspective of the victim.
In addition, the bullies should also know that goodness must bring a little sharpness.While maintaining kindness, we must also learn to protect ourselves, and we must not conquer and change our principles.Some schools and parents may think that bullying is a matter between children and has nothing to do with themselves.However, campus bullying reflects the epitome of the society, and the behavior of adults also directly affects the psychological development of children.The so -called body education is not as good as teaching, and the school and parents can do their best to do their best, so that children have established a good -looking concept from an early age.
The author is a doctor and a clinical psychology researcher
